The Dealer
by hamm3rheart
Summary: When you have everything you could've ever wanted in life, what more could you want? {{ Summary will be changed later. }}


_**To be quite honest, this isn't the first time I've posted this. I posted this prologue a while back and wasn't pleased with it, so I took it down. I haven't written anything else after that for a number of reasons that won't really be explained. Just know that writing isn't always something that comes easy to me, and whenever it does, it's usually something that I've dedicated a shit-ton of time on.**_

_**Just letting you all know ahead of time, that this story will possibly be the darkest fic I've written. There isn't a happy ending.**_

_**So without further ado, the prologue to **_**"The Dealer" **_**entitled: "**_**White Death."**

* * *

The danger of running from something only you can see is simply that. No one can see it but _you_.

I must've looked like a madman running around aimlessly; trying to escape _him_, but to others it merely looked as if I was running from the wind.

Which is silly, if you think about it. You can't run from the wind, it's all around you.

Just like _he's_ all around me. He constantly permeates my thoughts and taints my actions to the highest degree…making me feel even more like shit than I currently feel.

I hop over boxes and quickly duck under wires and even jump from roof to roof, but as always _he's_ twenty steps ahead of me, smirking that smirk of his and making me hate him more.

I quickly decide to change tactics.

I run to the farthest point, again hopping over boxes and I smirk as I hear him calling out for me.

"_Ciel… what are you doing?_"

"None of your fucking business."

"_I hope you aren't planning on doing what I think you are. I've told you before, it won't work-_"

"Bullshit! You just told me that so I wouldn't try it again; so I won't get help from others! Well, this time I'm helping _myself_. I'm doing this _my_ way and you can't stop me!"

I said as I ran further and further away, closer to the outskirts of town where you could see the ritziest part of town – where I grew up – and decided to end my misery.

* * *

I'm at the edge of a high apartment complex. The wind is whipping at my face and I smile at the speed of it.

"_Ciel…you don't want to do this_."

"Fuck off. You don't know me."

"_Ah, but I do. I know you better than anyone. I _am _you-"_

"Shut up! Shut the fuck up!" I'm hitting my head against my hands and breathing rather heavily. The annoying asshole chuckles and sips a glass of something deep and red. Wine, perhaps? I scoff, realizing I really don't give a shit.

"_Well, are you going to do it?" _ I heard him say with a hint of amusement in his voice and he smacked his lips as if to prepare himself for the entrée at hand; which would be my soul, but I'll be damned if I give him the satisfaction of having it. I never fully agreed to that.

"I'm thinking about it." I said as my brow twitched and he chuckled.

"_Go for it…**I'll even give you a push.**_" He said as I growled and turned to face him as he leaned against a chimney and he nursed his glass and as I watched him with wild eyes and hatred deep set in my heart.

"_Tell me, Ciel. Do you hate me, the way you act when you're with me, or how I see your every thought - every action as it's played out in your mind… leaving nothing hidden? I knew when you were plotting to end your life, but I played coy only for the sake of the chase."_

I watched him with realization deep set into my eyes as he walked towards me after tossing his wine glass over his shoulder, and it shattered against a chimney. He then cupped my face and I flinched and stepped away from him and ultimately fell.

* * *

It's cold.

I vaguely remember putting on a coat today before I left my penthouse. Didn't I?

Oh, right. I did because I feel it now; a thin beige pea coat with gold buttons that's shielding me from the harsh, hard cold ground.

My head feels heavy, and it's throbbing like mad. It was like my brain is trying to escape my skull and sprint down the street where it'll be free of me putting toxins into my body and seeing _his_ stupid fucking smirk all the time.

Damnit, even in my current situation I'm _still_ seeing that fucker. It wasn't fair.

Then again, life isn't fair, is it?

I struggled to open my eyes and when I finally did, what I saw both surprised the fuck out of me _and_ relieves me all at the same time: blood.

There's blood staining the pure white snow I'm currently lying in. I always thought snow was soft. My breath comes out in shallow pants and it was as if upon seeing the current state I'm in - _dying _– the rest of my body decides to kick in and get with the program.

Tch. I always was a late bloomer in life. Why not be one in death too?

I chuckled, but it came out choked and gurgled, like my lungs were quickly filling up with my blood and I just _knew._ Kind of weird I just realized it was doing just that the whole time.

_This…was it._

I'm _actually_ dying.

I feel something wet hit my face and look up to see it was snowing. I smile softly as I take in my surroundings one last pitiful time; the building with the horrendous graffiti on the side, the fish 'n chips store that also sold Bourbon and Brandy if you flirted with the manager, and finally, past the entire city, straight ahead, was my parent's estate, high up on a hill. It looked like it was in the clouds.

My hands then felt soiled with not only my blood, but theirs too. I didn't mean to end them, but…they were going to take me away from the one person that made all of the craziness in my head go away.

I tried to chuckle again, but it only came out more gurgled than before, so I stopped trying to have a laugh at my current state. But I couldn't help it. I laugh anyway.

I licked my lips and tasted blood as I felt my heart rate start to slowly decrease. It went from 20 beats to 15, to 10, then 5. I then slowed my shallow pants to deep breathing as I began to embrace death like an old friend. Just as I began to _feel_ myself slipping, a voice called me.

"CIEL!"

I open my eyes and look straight up it's the only movement I was capable of sense I'm dying and all.

"Ciel, please don't go! We _need_ you! _I_ need you!" Someone cried as I felt tears fall from my eyes for the first time in years. I stared up and smiled forlornly as I saw … sob and call out for me, but it wasn't like I could go up there and reassure him I was alright, could I?

Fuck no. And I wasn't alright. I was dying. This was _it_. The curtain call. The end of the line; the end of everything.

I closed my eyes and when I opened them, my heart slowed; a depressing final thudding that was so loud I swear _he _could hear it. The fear radiating off of me in waves…like a pleasant scent caught in a breeze.

"No." I whispered but he simply stood there.

And grinned, like the sick, masochistic fuck he is.

Even in death, he still torments me.

Well, at least this way I'll finally be free of him. _Or am I?_

_.._

_Read and review._


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